Since we have been starving students the last few years, my husband and I decided to kind of do away with frivolous holidays (like Valentine's, Easter, Anniversary...) Not that we don't try to take the opportunity to say we love each other - just that we decide not to get eachother presents for such holidays (or if we see something we want/need we say that can be our Valentines gift). I know there are some wonderful creative people out there who say that you don't need money to celebrate such Holidays. I agree with you. I just wish I was more creative and had more energy to carry out such thoughtful acts. It has been one of my goals to be more thoughtful in that way... but that is another blog for another day.
My husband is graduating this May and we have a real job in the forseeable future. So, I asked my husband last night if next year we are going to start celebrating Valentine's day and stuff. He makes a good point that he only does it to make me happy, but that he dislikes Valentine's Day. The problem is, if you want to go out to eat, it is the busiest night at most restaurants. Most date places are overly crowded. Then if you want to buy flowers they are way overpriced and mean less than if he gave me flowers on any other day (because on Valentine's it is more expected). I agree with most of his points but there is a part of me that still loves Valentine's Day and what it represents.
I know that most holidays are so commercialized that it almost ruins them. I'm not saying I don't love any excuse to get/give presents - because I love that. But I just don't like how because it is so commercialized, the thoughts and sentiments on Valentine's Day become expected or routine. The day is supposed to be the day of romance, but how is it romantic when your calendar and every ad and store tell you to be so? So, this is my dilemma - how can we celebrate such holidays, this day in particular, with real sincerity? I guess I am having a hard time because I love holidays. I love having an excuse to celebrate something. I love gifts and candy and flowers and romance. But I kind of hate holidays sometimes too because it reminds me that I should be more thoughtful and creative and giving. Something I am not very good at...
10 comments:
Frick I just left an excellent comment but then blogger kicked me out.
Anyway I was saying that I agree with you 100%. We are just too poor to spoil each other on V-day and really what is the point? We don't need material things from each other to know that our marriage is good and that we are in love you know? We like to just keep it simple and have a nice dinner at home together nothing too flashy.
Raleigh says though that when he gets a real job he's going to have his secretary pick out something for me for these kinds of things. So maybe Brian will start doing that for you next year. HA! I would kill him if he really did that. (Raleigh I mean!)
Hola ANH!!
I agree. Although my parents always did the 14 days of Valentines and we do that too. I love it! For days 1-14 of February you just do something small like a card, bake cookies, a chore (putting away all the clothes was a big one this year) heart attack his car, but the point is to do free or cheap service. It is funner to me to see what he comes up with because it does take a little thought. But I enjoy it even if it is for the so called Valentine's Day! It is funner than getting a big gift or flowers. So that is my thought. It probably doesn't help answer any problems and might create a bigger problem for Brian if you want to do it! Love ya Shanon
So I don't mind Valentines day but it is hard for it to be a "romantic" day. For example Seth and I went out to dinner (and when I say out to dinner I mean we went to a ward adult party) and at the table he commented on how the lasagna was good but not as good as mine and then everyone was all, "Earning points on Valentines". It made the comment non-romantic because did he really mean it or was it said in the Valentines Day spirit? I would rather just have a romantic day sometime in August. BTW I know he meant it, my lasagna rocks.
Tara- You are right, a secretary picked out gift would definately land the hubbie in the doghouse. Stupid boys just don't get it.
Shan- you guys are cute to do the 14 days of thoughtful acts. I think Brian wanted to delete your comment when he read it... but it is a good idea and would be nice to get little surprizes for 14 days. We will see how many years it will take for me to get BA on board.
Blondie- can I get your lasagna recipe?
For our V-day, we ate Chick-Fil-A, and then made a nest in the living room out of blankets and pillows. Then we watched Lost and ate fatty things. It was super fun. I kind of like the fact that V-day gives you a chance to build a nest and eat fatty things on a week night.
Valentine's Day at our house= ordering pizza for dinner, having cupcakes for desert, and hanging out with our kids in between taking them to soccer and volleyball practice, changing diapers, and putting away laundry. So maybe Valentine's Day is really for people like us who have 5 million kids, and need an actual calendar date to schedule romance into our lives, but don't actually end up scheduling the romance anyway because life is still too busy. I'm with you- make it great and fun for your kids, and then have Brian take you out on a great date when you least expect it but need it the most.
Oh man did I come through in the clutch! I had the deacons come over and sing the whole song of "So Happy Together." It lasted like 10 minutes w/o a single one of the kids making eye contact with us or raising their voice much more than a whisper. Ok, so the truth is, I did it just as much to embarrass the Deacons as I did to give Ali a romantic gesture. I am the world's greatest Valentine.
That was quite the surprize. Thanks hun!
Well... next February you can make BA take you to LE CIRQUE
I know I'm a little late on this one but I have some advice. I just want it noted that I hate valentines day more than any other holiday. That said, this year I had a test that I needed to study for and take on Valentines day so I told my wife we werent going to celebrate until a few days after...best decision ever. not only did we not have to try and do anything gay, or cram into some crowded restaurant, when I finally did go buy roses 2 days after V-day, they were 50% of the V-day prices, and beatiful. From now on, our V-day is coming on Feb 16th.
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